Returning to the eye specialist later this week. I'm tired of doctors and medicines altogether. Too many pills, shots, tests, waiting rooms. Before getting ill I was strictly an aspirin and vitamin person, that was it and to me, more than enough. Maybe I will get some good news, like the steroids are slowing the progress of my disease as they take down my immune system. I need good news. The other medications being tried for AutoImmune Retinopathy are too dangerous. I won't risk trying them and ending up with side effects that will make me a total invalid or possibly be fatal. Steroids are my one chance at seeing awhile longer, they have to work so I can maybe have a little more time.
The house is mostly clean. There is one more load of laundry to wash, the hobby room is a huge mess, piled everywhere with clothing.
Our bedroom closet is next week's project. I have the paint, wallpaper and custom shelving ready to install. Once that is done every article of clothing and all of the accessories will be photographed and a lookbook of outfits will be assembled.
Still figuring out a system to find everything when I can no longer see it. Frustrating, I'm still puzzled as to just how to go about it. Labels of some sort, putting buttons or pins perhaps on labels, but then how to mark things like shoes or socks...
Marking appliances and canisters with raised bumps was easy. I can use most things in the kitchen. Cutting things is really hard, I'm scared that I will slice myself up. Reaching across hot burners to get to the controls on the stove is difficult. I pretty much quit using the stove for cooking, and am using crockpots and electric skillets. Not easy, but it helps.
Going through the kitchen and hobby room again, weeding out more items and simplifying my life. Knowing that things I thought that I'd need over the holiday season were not used means I can pass them on without guilt.
Tried to read part of a novel the other night. Just could not get into it. Lately all I can handle is non-fiction, things mainly to help me adapt and adjust to blindness which gets steadily worse.
I feel a time crunch where sight is concerned, almost a panic mode to try and get everything done as quickly as possible while I can see enough to do them. I worry about being in total darkness and attempting to live normally. One of my doctors suggested I get a housekeeper to help out. Good idea, but I'm not ready for that step at this time. Perhaps with spring and fall housecleaning and then see how it goes. I really do have to give kudos to a doctor who has great ideas instead of pills, that is the kind of thing that does help me. Too bad books that are written to help people adapt to low vision and blindness do not include things like that. The books I've read say "get closer" and "use a magnifying glass". Those are great ideas as long as doing those things still help. When the vision is gone no magnifying glass will do a thing.
Thought about starting an aquarium and then decided it might not be the best idea. The dog and cat can tell me when they are hungry. Fish are too doggoned quiet, they'd starve if I forgot or got busy. Same for aquatic plants, I'd end up with an aquarium full of dead plants, pretty sad.....
Tomorrow I hope to get the garage in order. My treadmill is in there along with an antique stove, bookcases full of gardening supplies, a folding area for the laundry, golf equipment, a tool box and a work table and shelves to store the power tools. Also, 2 trikes and Darling Husband's vehicle, a huge Expedition. Hard to believe my Subaru used to fit in there also.
Now that the holidays are over I have plenty of projects to keep me busy. At some point I have to make a grocery list and get to the store. The freezer is packed full at this time as well as most of the cupboards. I know I need a new soup ladle, I somehow melted the one I have. There are photo frames to purchase, and the sunlight has caused some lace curtains (at least 10 years old) to shatter. I want brightly colored cutting boards and utensils so I can see to work in the kitchen. I also need lighting under the kitchen shelves so I can see the counters easier. I just really need things that can let me stay independent awhile longer.
Lots of thinking tonight about the things to do in the next few weeks. It seems as though there is so much on my list and yet pacing myself and doing just one thing at a time will let it all get done. I am impatient, wanting everything done now.
When the to-dos are done it will be time to start the flowers indoors for our gardens. There are packets and bags of flower seeds, mostly annuals. The packets of Birds Of Paradise seeds which arrived around Thanksgiving need to be planted. That will be something to really look forward to.
Add Elephant Ear bulbs to the shopping list. Go ahead and plant Hyacinth bulbs tonight or tomorrow indoors just for fun.
I do love growing plants, indoors and outside. It relaxes me in many ways. Having my hands in the dirt and seeing results of digging makes me happy. Making things grow and bloom feels good to my soul, I feel a type of peace that few other things give me. Accomplishing and being rewarded for hard work and effort by wonderful sights and delightful smells is so special. I spend a lot of time in the warm weather out in the gardens. The gardens look better each year, we keep adding things. For my 50th birthday, Darling Husband got me a Weeping Willow, something I had always wanted.
Enough for tonight.
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